Last Day of October (SPOOKY Bright Eyes Parody)

This is the last day of October
Swear I was spooked right in the doorway
I went down the stairs suddenly everything changed
They’re spreading cobwebs on the stoop

Yours is the first mask that I saw
I think I was fine before I met you
Now I don’t know where I am
I don’t know where I’ve been
but I know I’m surrounded by corn

And so I thought I’d let you know
That these things take forever
I especially am slow
But I realized I can’t see you
And I’m screaming “Can I please go home?”

Remember the time you cut the lights
Just to scare me in the evening
And I thought it was strange that you made a loud bang
You pretended you could not get up
And you said “this is the last day of my life
I’m going to die right in your arms soon
but now I don’t care because I had an affair with Stu
JK wasn’t that spooky?”

So if you want to be with me
please just end the yelling
and stop trying to scare me
I’ll give you my whole paycheck
just promise that you’ll let me be
Besides maybe this time is different
I mean I really think you’re bleeding.

Band Name Origins

  • Fun. After playing four consecutive gigs as “The Fun Guys,” Nate Ruess decided to ditch the band’s trippy, Psilocybin mushroom-themed sound and shorten the name to “Fun.” At least, while Phish was in town.
  • The Strokes. Julian Casablancas was on the swim team in high school, before getting kicked off for masturbating in the pool.
  • Band of Horses. Originally a coked-out Phil Spector’s idea for a novelty hit machine, the band name was passed down to some desperate guys from Seattle years later, when the courts finally decided it was inhumane to make Palominos sing, wear a dress, or stay locked in a house. 
  • The Rolling Stones. Mick Jagger once fell down a hill after he smoked too much pot during an adulterous trip to Iran.
  • Mott the Hoople. Tomm the Hoople became a registered sex offender.
  • Bright Eyes. Conor Oberst really misheard that Hall and Oates song.
  • Hall and Oates. John Oates really misheard Daryl Hall’s response to “We should start a band.”
  • Sonic Youth. Shawn Kemp gave an eleven-year-old Thurston Moore his game-used jersey after collecting six rebounds in front of a capacity KeyArena crowd.
  • The Beatles. “The Simpsons” reference.
  • The Paul Simon Blart Garfunkel Mall Cops. You decided to join me in the greatest musical endeavor since DeadMau5 proposed over Twitter.